Thursday 3 January 2013

Have you ever...

  • sat in a waiting area of a mental health service in total distress and overheard the conversation where someone sums up your life experiences -completely emotionless- within a few seconds and talking almost as if they're so much better tan you you should've stopped existing a long time ago?
  • made a noose, the 'proper' way?
  • put a rope around your neck and wished and prayed you had the courage to just take one teeny tiny step, then, having been unable to do such a small thing, come back down and written on your arms -with a blade?
  • wished you'd stopped existing many many years ago and thus everyone around  you would be 'back to normal' by now?
  • been in a group and felt like you just weren't behaving like everyone else?
  • noticed your medication stock being so depleted that there isn't enough for the week but you just seem unable to pick up the damn phone and ask for more??
  • been on the threshold of coping?
  • felt your skin cry out to be punched/cut/burned?

2 comments:

  1. Is it weird if I say I have numerous times on a few of those? When my body cries out for me to hurt it, it begs, it screams... When I try to resist the urge it's like trying to keep from breathing, I can feel my mind cracking...like I'm just going to lose it if I do not do it.

    ReplyDelete
  2. my skin itches and it's as if it has a life of it's own and a mind of it's own...and a piercing cry like that of a newborn in utter need...and only it's mother can hear and answer that cry...coz it never stops...

    ReplyDelete