Psychiatry Appointment Mix Up and Mixed Up

so...tonight...today...yesterday...all weekend...

tried2draw

can't

tried to blog

can't

tried to write

can't

can write on me though

trying to fight it

fighting

and knackered

...i wanna punch a wall...

i headered one at 4am yesterday morning...apparently this was not sufficient...

...i also set my hair on fire

was all very bizarre

am still a bit....

meh...



didn't sleep all night worrying about stupid appointment with psychiatrist because it feels like last chance saloon...incident with lighter apparently put me into complete auto-pilot and i went to the wrong place for appointment -they are named very very similarly and within a mile of each other...

...i then struggled for the rest of the day to NOT visit B&Q to buy a 'just incase' rope...

My arms are burnt (chemically) beyond belief!!



I DON'T WANT TO BE ME ANYMORE

i don't think i ever did...

i don't know that anyone hates me but i DO KNOW that if i hate me most and hurt me most -anything anyone else says or does pales into insignificance...